Mr FF had a nightmare day last week. He had to go to London for an important meeting which was scheduled for 7pm in central London and at 6pm, with an hour to kill, he thought he would pop into a bank and draw out some sterling('cos the Brits are so anxious not to join the Euro).
The cash machine was on the first floor and as he had his laptop bag and overnight case he thought he'd take the lift - bad move. He got stuck between floors and had to wait to be rescued by the fire brigade. They were unable to get the lift to a level for an easy exit and he had to hoist himself up through a gap they had made by using crowbars, ripping his beautiful Paul Smith suit in the process - yes he arrived just in time for the meeting but with trouser leg and its lining flapping nicely and 'in a bit of a state'.
There is a claim in with the bank for a new suit but, in the meantime, the branch manager just sent us (well him, but I've staked my claim) a hamper. Oh well, the diet* will have to start another year.
*thank goodness our French doctor thinks women look better when they come in a larger size. Whenever I mention the D (for diet) word to him he gives that dismissive Gallic shrug and tells me ne vous inquiétez pas
40 comments:
Oh dear! Glad Mr. FF is all right -- what a trial that must have been. I've been stuck in an elevator once, but only briefly and without need of crowbars (or the fire department). You must be relieved that it was only the trouser leg that took damage and not Mr. FF himself.
Love the description of your doctor's shrug.
Cheese = good, in fact, very good
Parsnips = rather spend two weeks in an elevator!!!
Dieting -I've given up too
Nice to get a hamper; shame about the Paul Smith suit.
I hope the hamper was HUGE!!!
Poor Mr. FF. Sounds like one of WT's travel tales. Nice of them to send the hamper, though. Yum!
What a horrible experience.
I'm just glad he was able to hoist himself up. Not everyone would have been able to.
Just shuddering at the thought of being trapped:-(
(I spy Fudges in 'your' hamper. Hmmmm:-)
ContemTroub - I've also been stuck in one but people kept reassuring me from outside that help was on its way. Mr FF was in silence and nobody kept talking to him to tell him the fire brigade were coming. In fact he rang me - it was lucky he could get a signal - and then from France I rang Barclays central number to try and summon help for him - but all I got was a voice telling me to key in my 14 digit number.
Mark - yes, I can see two wheels of cheese through the polythene - in fact they are visible in the photo.. Can't see any parsnips though. (roast parsnips - yum)
Dumdad - that's it in the photo and it seems to have three layers from my discreet poking and prodding it. I can see a bottle of Chivas Regal, fudge, mince pies, mints, cheese, crisps, sesame thins, liqueur chocs, marmalade, chutney, more crispy looking things, xmas pud, bottle of white looking something (probably alka seltzer) and lots more hidden things
willow - there is no way I could have hoisted myself through the roof of a lift with a hole in it. I wouldn't have the upper body strength. I'd have sat tight - in fact Mr FF later wondered why nobody thought of lowering a chair through the hole.
Lane - I've earmarked the choc, mints, mince pies and crisps - he's put his metaphorical mark on the brandy, the cheese and the fudge. He's also making noises about keeping it for Christmas but I predict, on a low moment this week, something or other will get opened.
Ahhh, I was wondering why he hadn't posted anything on his blog for a while!! Why did he decide to give it up?
Sorry to hear about the suit...thank god he wasn't bursting for the toilet at the time...that could have made a bad situation much worse!!
Enjoy the hamper
C x
Well done Mr FF for securing a deliciously wicked hamper... Ooops - I mean, poor Mr. FF! ;-)
Can I have the name of your Docteur, Madame??!
Poor Mr FF, and pauvre pauvre Paul Smith!
Beautiful hamper, though, and definitely a nice touch by the bank.
As for my back, darling FF, it's not too bad really - Still got numb foot and bits of leg, makes driving challenging, and drag my special chair about with me in the office a lot - Elsewhere, I just have to be really careful how, and how long, I sit and where... I need to lose weight though, and intend to start for sure in the New Year... Hold me to it, s'il te plait, my petal? Mwah xox
OMG I got stressed just reading that, poor TAF!..tell em one hamper is not enough! best wishes Blu x
Very Bridget Jones!...male version of course. Poor Mr. FF, he has my sympathies, being stuck in a lift is no fun..eating those goodies looks like it will be though!
Has Mr FF watched The Matrix? If someone had got into the elevator with him muttering "there is no spoon" he may have lost more than his trouser leg...!
Getting trapped in a lift is a real-life nightmare, glad Mr FF got out okay. Mmm that hamper looks delicious - I'm sure you'll both make up for all of the extra calories by using the stairs in the future.
That is scary! Glad to hear he's okay and no bodily damage occurred.
And diet? You surely don't need it!!
Oh, poor Mr FF! I'm with you on not being able to hoist myself out IF it were me (I can't get out of the swimming pool, even..)Still, like you - I would have appreciated the hamper. I mean - it's hard work worrying about a husband who gets stuck in a lift. Imagine how the metabolism would have had to work overtime. A girl needs sustenance, yes?
Well, the hamper may not make up for the suit and the shock, but it was a nice thing for them to do.
Poor Mr. FF! What a nasty experience. Glad the bank is owning up to their responsibility.
Bless your French doctor.
Well, sometimes a grey suit trouser's lining has a silver cloud....
Did I get that backwards or mixed up or something ? Sorry, it's late, but I'd warrant you sussed my meaning ?
That hamper looks tasty, I think I'm off to go see that bank and rip my pants on their premises... Now, now, I didn't say I was going to rip them off... wouldn't want any bank tellers to faint...
Poor Mr. FF. I would have passed out in the lift if it was me with my claustrophobia! How kind of the bank manager to send you a hamper! It's a pity Paul Smith's suit has been ripped but it adds a new dimension to the suit. I heard Moschino is bringing in a new suit design which has torn and chalk marks all over :)
PS. I absolutely adore the picture of your two Bichons in the snow!! I love to have one!!! The novelist, Barbara Taylor Bradford can have one, now why can't I?
Thats lovely, FF , and well deserved too by the sounds of it.
So you're a blogging couple eh? I am so jealous - my husband won't go near blogging! I have to keep my blogs to myself! Its lonely xxx
I'd LOVE to be stuck in a lift and have to be rescued if I was guaranteed a safe conclusion and a quality hamper. I agree with Carol though...to be caught short would be very awkward and just another way of ruining a good suit.
Great story! It gave me a lift!
That must've been a horrifying experience, but what a story it is, to tell!
Carol - Oh just imagine! If that had been me I would have wanted the loo just out of nervous worry
Fi - well, he needs his suit now for next week and it is just not possible to wear. Curses!
AWONI - isn't it hard to lose weight. I don't even eat that much (honestly) and I can't seem to shift it
Blu - I've been banned from the hamper now - it's got to wait until the 25th
Reasons - well, I've mailed the bank manager with the cost of a replacement but he's not got back to me - funny that!
Steve - I don't recall that but I've only seen the first one
Carrie - I've vowed not to be too piggish - I just need to brainwash myself successfully for Christmas day now
Angie - I'm a little porker. Let's just say I'm probably the same as Kylie x 2
TMW - if the firemen had yelled down to me 'hoist yourself up so far and we'll do the rest' I'd have just stayed put sobbing my heart out
CA - it was a lovely lovely gesture
Dedene - our doc is lovely, simply wonderful - we have the same birthday and he always kisses my hand when I arrive and leave
Owen - hmm, can't think of a witty enough reply, monsieur
ASD - some of those haute couture designs are just plain daft. I prefer simple classic things without gimmicks
- well, when it comes to mens' suits anyway. And one day, when you have the honeysuckle covered cottage I am sure you will have your little white lapdog
Jen - I was wrong to mention it really - oopsie
x
Ken - I bet you would have hated it!
Bindu - I'd still be talking about it but he hasn't really milked it
The horror of being caught in a lift - poor man.
Nice treats though!
Oh I want your doctor!!!!!
Poor mr ff! Is he ok?
I'd hate to be stuck in a life unless............but I won't go there ;)
These banks know how to pour oil on troubled waters! Enjoy the hamper and leave the diet until next year. Well the hamper won't keep but next year will. Glad Mr FF is OK. The suit can be replaced.
I did manage to receive your reply on twitter re Mr FF and the lift business, thank god he is okay.
Hope he gets a nice new suit and if YOU eat all the goodies he will still fit into it, so alls well that ends well haha. I will join you on the diet come January :-), failing that I will look for a french doctor!. That hamper looks yummy.
Vanni just came home with Japanese biscuits (from clients) I think they are made in France.
I love them so much I am going to blog about them.
Have a lovely rest of the week, hugs, Kathy.
I once got stuck in a lift in a London hotel. I was sharing it with a lovely woman. Alas, no sensual adventure transpired and I didn't get a hamper, either.
Life is very unfair....it should have been the whole shebang of Barclays top management stuck in the lift and the fire brigade on strike for a really happy Christmas story.
Still, well done Mr. FF for carrying on regardless and enjoy your hamper.
Just watch out as it comes from Barclays that what you think is Alker Seltzer isn't a poison pill to abort your case for compensation before the New Year...
a disgusted ex Barclay customer with a long and rancorous memory.
These days, if I got stuck in an elevator, I'd want to use the time to get a nap.
Our museum's elevator used to stop moving from time to time. We'd hear the little ringing of the panic bell, and call it back to wakefulness. Then I'd take the next ride with the passengers, holding my security officer radio like it would fix everything. It would always work fine for me. I think they just weren't pushing the old buttons with enough sincerity.
Still, looks like you got an early Christmas out of it. Hope the new suit looks nice, too.
FF, last night I was reading in my bed a collection of English short stories "Nothwithstanding" by Louis de Bernieres about a retired Major who goes shopping in town but he forgets to put on his trousers. I suddenly started to think about Mr FF and his torn suit. I felt very sorry for him. can you imagine what I would be like in his place? I mean being locked in the lift is bad enough. Going to an interview (is itself a stressful thing to do) in a beautiful suit which is now torn, I would have passed out!!! Poor Mr. FF.
ASD xx
PS. Paul Smith is the best when it comes to classy outfits, you know. I love his shop in London.
Lulu - I've been caught in a lift too but not on the way to an important meeting. And I never got a sorry hamper
claire - our doc has the same birthday as me, not really relevant but just further indication that he is a good bloke. It sounds like I fancy him but I don't, not in the least - Mr FF is the only man for me!
cheshire wife -the suit was a good price in the Selfridges sale a few years back - we'd probably not be so lucky to find it at a good price again - however the bank will be paying so...
Japanese bikkies from France - how odd that sounds. At least our local supermarket has just cottoned on to the fact that sushi can be sold here at last. As for diets - I know everyone overweight always says this but ...I don't really eat that much but find it very hard to shift the pounds - must be my age starting with a 5 now!
Ian - wrong lift, wrong person by the sound of it.
tfitw - oh I bet you could tell a good Barclays story or twenty! go on - dare yer.
Larry - I can just picture you looking the confident lift man with your walkie talkie - hoping that the blooming thing would keep going
ASD - the suit was lovely and I got in touch with a tailor in Savile Row who does invisible mending. It would cost £200 to patch the trousers successfully, plus postage. They undo the suit and take unused material from the seams, unweave the strands and then weave them over the torn area. It sounds a real scientific art but I'd rather the bank paid for a new suit.
We got the old one in a sale at the Men's Designer Section at Selfridges - but I doubt we will find the same bargain again. Oh well, Mr FF pointed out the suit's quality to the Barclays manager at the time of his release from the mess that the lift had become so he does realise it will be an expensive reimbursement.
As for Louis de Bernieres - I loved the book Captain Corelli's Mandolin except for the cheesy ending and I was very upset with what a dreadful film it got turned into
x
Poor Mr FF but nice hamper. If you have any spare...?
Oh my FF!! Selfridges!!! I'm talking posh here!! You and Mr FF are both gentry!! This is where the gentry shops :) BTW, are you listening to Babs new CD?? or are there another singer with the same name I don't know about? My dear, you know how I adore her!! You can tie me to a chair and play her songs over and over, I would not mind it at all.
Phil - it's now in the basement at m-i-l's house to save us both from temptation
ASD - someone sent me her newest CD - the one with all the classics on (I just love the song 'If you go away'). She is the supreme female singer - none can hold a candle to her.
As for Selfridges, I actually prefer John Lewis in Oxford Street but the Selfridges sale is superb. It's about 8 years since we last went - yes, that is how old the suit was
x
Yes, teh diet must wait I think. hope that hamper was good. I'm quite sure it was in fact.
Hiya mmm - it's not been rummaged with yet. We've put it in the basement at my m-i-l's house (she is ten mins away) and we're saving it for Christmas
Wow! Get the kettle on I'm coming round!
GG
Remind me never to go to London on a business trip.
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