Tuesday, February 09, 2010
It's that time again
The time has come for me to stop kidding myself that I can lose weight on my own. I used to be able to not eat much for a week and drop half a stone. It was something I would regularly do when I was about 20 and for a few years I managed to remain slim without medical aid. Then when it became harder to do that I went to one of 'those doctors' in Harley Street for injections and pills. When my doctor of choice got struck off I found another doctor down the road, one with a celebrity client list, and who had managed to pass himself off as a legitimate health clinic, despite the fact that he was doling out the same injections and pills as the disbarred doctor. I even began buying slimming pills from dealers, so desperate was my desire to stay slim (with the minimum of effort). I can't even begin to recall how many thousands of pounds I must have spent over the years on these meds, legal and illegal, but they did their job and I remained slim and attractive.
Of course when I gave them all up - following a 'bit of a situation' which I might blog about one day - the weight did what it always does when you have artifically kept it down. It piled on and, from the age of about 38, I have had a constant battle with it, one that I have not won for many years.
Weight Watchers is not as big in France as in the US and UK but it is still here. Tomorrow I will be going to a group meeting which is about an hour's drive away and to say I am in the zone is no exaggeration. You know when you get to the stage where you just don't like the body you are in anymore and you know that things have to change, well I reached that last week. I think being here most of the time now on my own is also causing me to turn to food a bit too much and, once on a definite eating programme, it will be easier for me to stay in control of food.
I've often said that given the choice between winning the lottery or being a naturally slim person able to eat anything they wanted, I would pick the latter. It must be the most fantastic feeling in the world to never put on an ounce and be able to wear clothes you had 30 years ago (although my ra-ra mini skirt and pixie boots might look a bit odd round here).